With Anti-Bullying Program, Local Woman Makes it Cool to be Kind

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Cool Kind Kid creator Barbara Gilmour with Bill Bowman, president and publisher of Kidsville News, and the publication’s mascot "Truman the Dragon" at the N.J. Education Association Convention in Atlantic City. (Photos courtesy of Barbara Gilmour)

By Tim Kelly Kindness is a choice. It can also be the cool choice for kids. That’s the message of Barbara Gilmour, an Ocean City resident, author, speaker, and creative voice behind Cool Kind Kid, an anti-bullying strategy that aims to re-define what is cool for kids as they encounter social situations. “The reactive measures don’t work,” said Gilmour. “Let’s provide our children with fun, engaging proactive (techniques to prevent bullying).” Gilmour’s firm, CKK LLC, offers a wide range of services and products aimed at helping students understand that using kindness is a better option than bullying, or tolerating it. The Cool Kind Kid programs teach social skills as a way to be confident and cool in situations that have the potential to go south. It’s working. The program has won 15 national awards, including Parents and Teachers’ Choice awards and earned the National Parenting Council’s Seal of Approval. More important than the accolades is the movement Cool Kind Kid has helped to start and foster. The concept is really simple, Gilmour explained. “We teach children to embrace the concept that being kind is a lot cooler than bullying,” she said. “We teach them to embrace the concept that the kind kid is also the cool kid.” Listening and talking, avoiding being rude, making a good first impression and displaying good manners in any social situation are a few of the areas covered through books, audio CDs, school assembly programs and more. The company is planning a series of fun, informative social skills classes in Ocean City, beginning May 8. There will be four two-hour classes, including snacks. A fifth class will take place at an area restaurant, to put students’ dining etiquette into practical use. Participants also receive a backpack, a picture book and a certificate upon completion.

Class sizes are limited to approximately 10 students, Gilmour said, thus early registration is encouraged. For more information, call 609-398-1949 or visit www.coolkindkid.com/social-skills-classes/

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=10153820585631885&t=7 Click on Facebook link to see video of Cool Kind Kid founder Barbara Gilmour being interviewed on a talk show hosted by Kathy Ireland. Gilmour, a Penn State University grad, backs her programs with research and proven curricula. She said that her team has known “since 2008, that social skills training was the missing link in bullying prevention” and the proactive approach could fill the void. She began at the request of her daughter’s college graduation. A few of her daughter’s friends were about to enter the work force and were very concerned about their lack of social skills, especially in dining situations, Gilmour said. “If the candidates for a job are evenly matched on qualifications, the person with the better social skills will be the person who gets the job,” she remarked. Gilmour put an informal class together for her sister’s friends, and the result was so encouraging she decided to launch the company. She enlisted the services of two friends, Sydelle Mason, the holder of a doctoral degree in education from Rutgers, and Wendy McDermott, a PhD in linguistics from Cornell University, to help develop the curriculum. Today, Cool Kind Kid offers classes, books, audio CDs, and entertaining school assembly programs among other products and services. There are also separate parental and teacher resource guides to help reinforce the lessons of the anti-bullying program and to present best practices to implement them. One of the books, “Tanner Wants to be Cool,” traces the journey of a real child facing real-life situations during which decisions must be made. It outlines how kindness, sympathy, empathy and other positive behaviors make more sense than bullying.

Table manners may seem to be a lost art nowadays, but Cool Kind Kid brings them back in a fun and engaging way. Bullying starts with rudeness, and it can escalate with bullying and ultimately violence in the worst cases, Gilmour said. Thus, she said, good manners and politeness are the first line of defense against bullying. “These techniques help build confidence in social situations. We help students know what to expect when (a situation arises),” said Gilmour. And as any kid will tell you, confidence is cool. And now, too, so is kindness.